Tuesday, December 28, 2010

A Must Read

With Max finally sleeping through the nights, I have been able to pick up some books that have been on my reading list for a long time. One of these books is "An Exact Replica of a Figment of my Imagination" by Elizabeth McCracken.

The book is a memoir about McCracken's stillbirth of her baby boy and a subsequent pregnancy. The author applies honesty, wisdom and even wit to a painful event. I have been finding so many similarities between her and my emotions (with the big difference being that I would never be able to put them into words the way McCracken did).

Ultimately, “An Exact Replica of a Figment of My Imagination” is sad and at times tear-inducing. ­McCracken offers an unstinting account of her grief and the outlying emotions it engenders, from embarrassment to feelings of failure to misdirected anger. It definitely is a good read and I would highly suggest it to anyone who has not experienced the loss of a child but knows someone close to them who has experienced such a loss. The book will provide much inside to the many aspects of grieving a baby or child.

I will leave you with one of the most moving passages from the book. ­McCracken imagines her tragedy as a comic book in which her baby is fine in one panel, and then: “In the next panel, seconds later, something is supposed to intervene. . . . But Superman never shows. I can see it so clearly. In one panel we are safe and stupid. In the next we’re only stupid.”


  1. This is now the umpteenth time I've seen this book recommended so I'm probably gonna read it. I'm so saddened by the story of your precious Lucas. My 1st daughter, Victoria, was stillborn at almost 41 weeks in July 2010. But even in the midst of my own grief and pain, I still think that SIDS is much worse. I am encouraged by the fact that you had Max this year. I'm also a CPA! Maybe there's a rainbow in my near future too! ;)

  2. I'll have to check that book out...sounds like a must read for sure. Thanks for posting about it.

  3. Hi Susi -- loved her memoir. Found myself laughing out loud -- brilliant in the face of the subject matter. Happy New Year to you and little Max.
    BTW, my rainbow baby, Ryan, arrived safe and sound on October 1. Amazing how healing it is to have another baby in the house. Hugs to you, Olivia

  4. new here, but my daughter was stillborn at 37 weeks....she was my fourth and it has been a year and half and it is still hard some days to pick up the pieces....